900000% of me wants to call out today and just continue to stay miserable in bed but that means someone else will have to pick up my nightshift and im the only person whos probably on that type of sleep schedule right now and i have to cook before the food in the house goes bad but its already 5 and i have to leave in a couple hours and i cant stop crying and i have to put on this stupid fucking face when i go to work to convince everyone im not an absolutely loathsome person to be around when really my depression is getting worse by the day and i genuinely couldnt hate living more than i do right now